I Was Here...

Tomorrow is the BIG DAY!!! Tomorrow, at this time I am going to go back to the grounds I just graduated from to meet at that globe and put my hand print on the world. I am embarking on my trip to South Asia. A three week journey that starts with a 18 hour flight...

So what have I been up to... well since the last time I posted lots have changed and happened. I am working three jobs. The first is lifeguarding for Special Olympics, second working for the city for the 5th year now as a lifeguard, swim teacher, and water aerobics instructor, and the third is a job at Miramonte Wineries were I work in the tasting room. I love all my jobs they all offer something different and challenging!

As far as the changing... I am not the same person that grabbed that diploma. I am a girl that wants just one thing in life... I don't want a fancy car, or a diamond ring, I don't want to live in a big house, I don't need to be a billionaire, I don't want to live a life that is meaningless... so this past month I have been focusing on what God wants me to do and what he has to offer me. I want to be able to look back on my life and say yes I glorified God and I was able to be used by him. Its hard.. Its not easy to do.. giving up your own desires for his, you may lose friends, you may gain friends, you may even change someone's life and be that inspiration to them. The life I am living is by no means easy but grain by grain I am letting go..

It reminds me of when you go to the beach and grab a handful of sand.. when you squeeze the sand and try to hold onto it.. it seems to fall from your hands more quickly.. I have tried to hold onto things hoping they can answer me but in the end if I just let it go and give it to God my life seems to hold more meaning without the garbage of the world.

I guess what I am saying is that I am ready to move on towards who I am supposed to be and I had to understand and let go of the things I can't control.

So what am I feeling right now... I am worried, I am anxious, excited and apprehensive for the journey I am about to embark on. I can't explain what it is but I have a feeling that this trip is going to do something for me bigger than I can even imagine. While I am away I hope that you all challenge yourselves to live a life that is meaningful instead of living for the meaningless..

"Whatever happens, conduct yourselves in a manner worthy of the gospel of Christ. Then, whether I come and see you or only hear about you in my absence, I will know that you stand firm in one spirit, contending as one man for the faith of the gospel without being frightened in any way by those who oppose you. This is a sign to them that they will be destroyed, but that you will be saved—and that by God."

Philippians 1:27-28

Till we meet again on this walk through some sunflower fields I hope you leave your mark on this world and stop every now and then to look back on where you have come and look forward to where you are going...

Im a College Grad!!!!

I graduated!!!! Its been 2 days since I made that walk down that grassy front lawn to receive my diploma... I still wake up thinking what school work do I have to do today. But I am done! I met great friends at CBU. I have my bestie Stephanie who never ceases to amaze me with her cut throat remarks but in the end we get and love each other. I wouldn't want to CUPID SHUFFLE with any one else!!! Jonathan is the one I can always go to with serious conversations and he doesn't mind listening to me go on and on and on. God has definitely had a hand in picking my friends. CT is just one of those guys you just can't live without! I haven't met anyone that can match my clumsiness till CT! Since grade school we have known each other but it was awesome getting to know him even better. Overall my friends here at CBU have inspired me. They have gotten me through the tough times and laughed at me during the great times. I will never forget them and I LOVE THEM ALL!!!!

PROVERBS 17:17 " A friend loves at all times"

Since graduating I have been cleaning, cleaning, cleaning... I am embarking on a new chapter in life so I decided that my room needs to represent the new me. I put all my childhood memories in a box and put them out in the barn... Everything from grade school through college are packed (unless of course it was homework, papers, tests, or notebooks that went to the trash man) old pictures, letters, love notes from previous relationships are stored away. Amazing how much stuff I could fit in my room.

Its a bittersweet feeling looking back on all the years but I am so excited to see what the future holds. I have a new outlook on life. I have fine tuned what is important in life and I finally realized that the only way to be truly happy is putting God first. I have never been more wide eyed about life and all it has to offer. I am truly blessed. I have friendships that will last a lifetime, a family that loves me through it all and a GOD who's unconditional love still amazes me.

In 21 days I leave for my ISP trip... I am so happy and nervous about it!!!! I know that God is working in my life and changing me and this trip will just be another tool to grow close to Him!!!

So I will leave you with this... ISAIAH 40:31

"but those who hope in the LORD

will renew their strength.

They will soar on wings like eagles;

they will run and not grow weary,

they will walk and not be faint."